What Is Your Pleasure?
I asked my 8yo the other day if she knew what “pleasure” was. She told me that she knew it was something “good” but beyond that - not really. I explained to her that pleasure was something we experience by way of our senses - sight, sound, smell, touch, or taste - that gave us a good, warm feeling inside. We continued the conversation by talking about things that brought us pleasure. Her top two things were hugs and ice cream; mine were feeling sun on my skin and hearing the laughter of my kids :)
I asked her this question in light of a book I’ve been reading (and obsessing over) called Come As You Are - The Surprising New Science That Will Change Your Sex Life, by Emily Nagoski. I’m sure it will come as no surprise that pleasure - among SO MANY other things Nagoski talks about - is a pervasive topic in the book. She speaks of the importance of reconnecting to one’s innate ability to experience pleasure and how relationship to pleasure varies by individual. Nagoski suggests taking on a “pleasure practice” to help one strengthen their perception and reception to pleasure, which, in turn, restores one’s capacity for experiencing it.
Noticing pleasure as it arises in daily life is the same skill one develops in a yoga practice. Through modalities such as holding postures, movement, breathing exercises, concentration, meditation, mantra, or any combination thereof - yoga asks the practitioner to observe the inner happenings of those experiences. For example, one may notice physical comfort or discomfort, states of emotion or stress, and/or physiological cues such as hunger or fatigue. Paying attention to such information is helpful in assessing one’s state of well-being, and can also provide helpful clues as to what direction they may want to move their states of being in response to the information recieved.
Of course, observing what is going on in the body is not the entirety of a yoga practice, just like pleasure isn’t all there is to living a fulfilled and whole life. But both of these skills are important and, IMHO, worth putting attention toward.
Perhaps you can take the rest of this month to engage in a “pleasure practice” of your own - whether through yoga or by becoming aware of your individual sense of pleasure. My hope is that this may cultivate stronger attention toward some of the beautiful things that life has to offer. If one of your personal pleasures in life is reading, then pick up a copy of Come As You Are. It’s not a wanton read about learning to please your partner, but rather a book committed to the logic behind learning to love yourself.
And now a YOGA SNACK!
I hope it’s not lost on you that this month’s blog entry revolves around pleasure, connection, and has insinuations of sex. Therefore the yoga snack above is a short practice for “heart-opening,” which you can also read as “chest and shoulder opening” if you’re feeling less romantically-inclined.
Anatomically-speaking, an open chest, rib cage, and shoulders can better articulate the way one interacts with world through their hands. This interaction with the world around us manifests through things like one’s professional or artistic work, ability to correspond with others (think waving, kiss-blowing, clapping, or grabbing), and showing affection through actives like hugging, touching, or cooking food for others.
Energetically-speaking, our heart center - or Anahata Chakra - is where unconditional love lives. It is considered the “unstruck or unhurt” center of the body and it is a place for compassion, empathy, and forgiveness to reside (ideally) unfettered by the outside world.
Please use this video if your feeling stuck, angry, or closed off to the world. If that sounds like hooey to you, then this video is good for stiffness/tightness in the neck, shoulders, chest, and lungs. Enjoy!
